Probably not. I've started my new blog on my speculation and musings about having become what is termed a "targeted individual". I'm more free to write about those trial and tribulations on a space that is not dedicated to my dad's case. Unless some terribly horrifying event happens to me - like another psychical attack - or inopportune gas leak - I won't be posting much here about the whole "targeted individual" thing.
That being said - I was really writting the last year's events in an email yesterday - and well the email was over 11 pages on a Microsoft word document. And I was trying my best to be brief! That help to organize everything in my mind - and it's just shocking all that I have been through. Ha and I'm still here!
Today I was wondering, what would happen if I were take everything down; the web page , the videos, the blogs, my posts in other forums, and never mention anything even again. Would I be able to wake up the next morning and make it all go away? Sadly from what I have read from other's victims plights the answer is a resounding no.
Everyone I know from my family, friends, even my doctor have told me to let it all go. They tell me not to look back and just get on with my life - and that all the bad events and covert harrasment will stop. That sounds reasonable, and I wish that would happen. How I wish I could just close my eyes and wake up and have this whole mess be gone. I wish sometimes more than anything to have turned back the hands of time and made sure I had never gotten involved in this case to begin with. I know I would have though. Given the fact that it was my father - who died when we were still just children -even knowing the hell I have been put through - I would probably do it all over again. These are matters of the heart. Matters of the soul and spirit.
Sometimes I wonder - given how powerful the lawyers and people who were involved in the potential cover up of the estate fraud - why did they even allow me to find out about it? Seventeen years of probate fraud and theft- why even allow my sister and I to find out? They could have covered it up if they had really wanted to right?
I wass sent on a wild goose chase - and I was up against lawyers with CIA connections and a lawyer who seems to be for all intents and purposes the "poster' boy for dozens of elite organizations and establishments. Including being the "president" to the Crown of Charlemagne. I read to day that 32 of our United States presidents originated from the Charlemagne lineage. Cool fact to learn! I didn't even know such organizations existed. I hope I didn't offend the whole establishement for talking bad about the person who represents them in the publics eye.
They are a very powerful and important lot of people. But I can't help it - this man was terrible to us! So I've spoken out about it. That does not mean that I am in anyway trying to put down the whole group :( I can trace my harassment and targeting directly to a particular lawyer when he came at the last minute to close my father's estate. That's when it really started. Even the things tailored at the ER.
I think the parties behind the gang stalking miscalculated me insomuch as underestimating my investigative skills. I don't think they knew I was going to be able to trace the harassing letters I received to back the the *liver family in Iowa. I don't think they thought I would be so quick and get the fire records and ambulance records , and find out that I was visited by a special team of special ops that responded to a three day long Co2 leak- and not my regular "firemen". The list of my discoveries could go on and on - yet I think given the fact that I do know - and potentially have a way to prove what I am writing - puts me more in danger than anything. Perhaps if I had played stupid .... I do wish it would all go away. I can keep hopeful right?
It is simply amazing the psychological rape I have been through. On top of that I had to grieve over and over again for the past three years whilst going on this little adventure of trying to seek justice. Three years- almost four now- where I dedicated myself 100 percent to this case and to the discovery process. I could have finshed my last year of college by now and have two years of postgrad studies! I isolated myself from friends and from even having a romatic relationship. My life was put on hold for the past three years.
Hundreds of thousands of dollars were stolen from my father's estate and from my sister and myself. My sister didn't even get braces on her teeth! Even if all that remained was 30 thousand dollars - and his shares - I would have been happy with that. I'm willing to bet that I spent more than 20 thousand on lawyers, airplane tickets, just trying to obtain the last part of my father's legacy. It wasn't about the money. It wasn't about the 30 thousand dollars. It was that it was my father's 30 thousand dollars. We never even received personal items of his after his death.
Anyways apart from the harassment, intimidation, and torture that I went through this past year. The parties stole the last part of my father from us.
It's almost as if we gave our inheritance in exchange to be harassed and put on some "hit list" of sorts. So in essence - my father's esate didnt by education for his daughters as he wished on his last letter he wrote to me- it bought them into a terrible heartbreaking situation where one would be harrased, attacked, and tortured.
Keeping an open mind - I've read that many targeted individuals suspect that they are in some kind of Mk Ultra related experiemnts after having been targeted.I've heard this question poised to other T.I.'s from people who are not really aware of what beign a targeted indivudual is - and they ask, "Well if you're so important, or if what is happening to you is real - why don't they just kill you?" Even my mom told me that if they really wanted to kill me - I would be dead by now. That's is the brilliant catch 20 in this situation.
Gangstalking is meant to coverty kill and destroy the individual. Push the individual to commit suicide or set them up for incarceration by lashing out. It is meant to mimic the events that someone with shizophrenia might complain about.
Once,again I'd ask anyone reading this to keep an open mind when I make the following points. MK Ultra and goverment and experiments and torture on unknowing citizens did exsit at one time. According to some all the way into the 80's. It is perfectly plausible that some kind of experiemntations still exist.
Did all these covert unethical operations- and scientists suddenly dissapear after the Church Committee hearings just stop? Just because president Clinton offered a formal apology to hundreds of MKUltra vicitms - is it really plausible to believe that the architects and mad scientists & the money and power of the miltary industrial complex just behind these Mk Ultra and Cointel operations - just decided "Hey um we better not do this anymore". I don't think so that is plausible.
Hundreds - if not thousands of people - are writting and posting web sites about thier experiences as a TI. The accounts are very errie in their similarites. I can't help but wonder if once someone is placed on the list so to speak - for whatever reason - crossed the wrong person with enough power and contacts ect ect. That the same infrastructure and organizations that tested on subjects in the hospitals aren't doing the same to targeted individuals?
That would be the beauty of it - is now they can get away with not experimenting on people in hospitals. They don't need to.They can do it to people in thier homes. If the person is a hier, that's an extra advantage to whichever s*ck b*strd turns them into the program. The vicitms will probably be so overwhelmed when the gangstalking begins -that they might commit suicide. If not they will probably talk about it and end up institutionalzed because gangstalking sounds unbelievalbe to most people.
I've done so much research on other targeted individuals - and I have found numerous accounts from other victims who experience terrifying gang stalking activited after thier parent died and they were left an inheritance. A few of the even blame the probate lawyers for targeting the gangstalking and harrasment on them!
Back to the Mkultra/ Covert torture and harrasment issue - the very CIA lawyer who represented Dr. Sindey Gotleib - appears on a letter concerning my father's shares and voting trust. His lawfirm has my father's company sharebook. Oddly enough he went to law school with the other lawyer who came in at the last minute to close my father's estate. Now that proves absolutley nothing - yet it leaves one to really wonder. We're not talking 6 degrees of seperation here - this is one degree of seperation in our case. That's scary!
Here's the description on Gotliebb:Sidney Gottlieb headed the secret Project MKULTRA which was activated on the order of CIA director Allen Dulles. Gottlieb was known for administration of LSD and other psycho-active drugs to unwitting subjects and for financing psychiatric research and development of "techniques that would crush the human psyche to the point that it would admit anything."
For the record I am not accusing this lawyer or lawfirm of anything - in fact I've had little to no contact with them - and the little contact that I did have they were somewhat amicable. Yet I'm sorry - it's still a little too close for comfort for me.
Not just because of all the trauma, coverups, and myself possibly having been drugged before my attack. But my sister who came home one night from work - after being heavily drugged by something - and never being the same again. There is no schizphrenia that runs in our family - so why her? Plus her MRI's show holes in the brain - which is indicative of drug damage - not schizophrenia.
There are some very sick and sadistic - and dare I say satanic individuals out there. What I am living through is a nightmare in itself. Other targeted individuals akin their experience as living in a silent holocaust.
I'm not going to come to the conclusion that yes indeed this is what is happening to myself and others - yet I can't help but wonder!
I still wish every morning that I could wake up and that the nightmare would just go away - as my family and friends say that it would - For now I will have to adjust to this new way of living and being - and take advantage of it to grow more both personally & spiritually.
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